I Could’ve Had a Whole Liquor Cabinet of Dogs…

The title sounds like animal cruelty, but you guys should know me by now. I am a dog person. My Chinese Zodiac is the dog. My parents’ life plan was to get the dog before they had a kid. I have even gone as far as telling boyfriends that the dog will win if it comes between the two of them.

Growing up, I had a golden retriever named Whiskey. Although my parents didn’t drink much in my early years, I somehow knew that my dog’s name also belonged to a type of alcohol. It helped that his coloring was similar to the drink: a warm brownish-red color that brought comfort (especially during chilly nights). During one of my silly moments, I was convinced that a spray of whiskey came out of his nose every time he sneezed.

The story behind my dog’s name (which did not come to light until years later) is that my dad enjoyed drinking whiskey and liked it enough to name a dog after it.

This story had me thinking that the rest of our dogs should be named after various types of alcohol.

If I went with that train of thought, I gave myself a dilemma: we could only get dogs whose colors matched different shades of libations.

A yellow lab would be called “Chardonnay.”

An Irish setter would have to be called “Jameson.”

A black Scottie would be named “Jaeger.”

A cream colored dog? Probably “Bailey.”

As we all know, our second dog was a pale blonde lab who managed to dodge the liquor names and was christened “Murphy Parker.” The irony of that one? My purebreed lab had bloodlines from England and Canada; we gave him an Irish name.

I’m still debating if the next dog will be named after a libation. What better way to combine two of the things in my life that bring comfort in a time of stress?

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